Friday, September 16, 2016

Wealthy White Male Makes His First "Friend"

My world travels begin on a routine business excursion to Buenos Aires, Argentina when an emergency landing put my private plane in a small panamese airfield that would remind one of the Indiana Jones franchise. My travels were meant to allow me to purchase a 6 million peso piece of land. This land would be the epicenter of my tea industry in Argentina. Argentines drink tea like its red bull and they're freshmen in college. It's a part of many of their indigenous rituals. I decided to exploit their culture for my own benefit. Unfortunately, following the crash, I decided that wasn't worth Scott Hendersons precious time. After landing, my servants unload my fat stacks of cash from the belly of the jet. It takes 17 hours for my 12 servants to unload my cash stacks. I now have taken this opportunity to share with the common people of Panama, my adventures as a powerful, global business force. I was greeted by a peasant today, he seemed delighted to see my money bags. I enjoyed that feeling, I usually do not turn my gaze on average humans, but today I made an exception. I made a "friend".

Image result for emergency landing in the jungle

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